I find middle C is a reasonably good tone to start with when thinking about composition. Very centering.
As some who reads a snark that has cheated further ahead, you're not going to find any reason to identify with Ana, or figure out the reason for her negative self-image. At least up to chapter ten.
I also find the idea of the Ugly Duckling storyline a little bit...eh, and a bit overused in romance stories. I realize, as a self-insert technique, it helps the reader empathize and live vicariously through the protagonist, but I would appreciate a story where the entirety of the courtship and/or romance acknowledges that the female lead is not bodily attractive, and doesn't really bring it up again, preferring to concentrate on the aspects that make the female lead a great romance partner. Hell, they can have all the kinkiest sex they want to, with as many partners of whatever gender identity they want to, but could we please have a book or other piece where the Ugly Duckling transformation isn't central to the romance?
When you talk about the narrative and or inner monologue, I'm reminded of the Sparklevampire and his special ability. Must be a pain to listen in on someone's thoughts to hear:
Hate my hair. Hate my eyes. Hate my roommate for being sick. Hate my hair. Hate-ow-really hate my hair. Hate my exams. Hate the fact that everyone thinks I'm an airhead it a walking pair of tits. Wish that the Nice Guy would just [REDACTED] [ANATOMICAL IMPOSSIBILITY] [IMPOLITE REFERENCE TO MALE GENITALS]. Is my roommate getting it on with someone again? Hate my hair.
So, yeah. Good thing is, we get to meet more of Ana's self-narrative later on. Brace yourself.
no subject
As some who reads a snark that has cheated further ahead, you're not going to find any reason to identify with Ana, or figure out the reason for her negative self-image. At least up to chapter ten.
I also find the idea of the Ugly Duckling storyline a little bit...eh, and a bit overused in romance stories. I realize, as a self-insert technique, it helps the reader empathize and live vicariously through the protagonist, but I would appreciate a story where the entirety of the courtship and/or romance acknowledges that the female lead is not bodily attractive, and doesn't really bring it up again, preferring to concentrate on the aspects that make the female lead a great romance partner. Hell, they can have all the kinkiest sex they want to, with as many partners of whatever gender identity they want to, but could we please have a book or other piece where the Ugly Duckling transformation isn't central to the romance?
When you talk about the narrative and or inner monologue, I'm reminded of the Sparklevampire and his special ability. Must be a pain to listen in on someone's thoughts to hear:
Hate my hair. Hate my eyes. Hate my roommate for being sick. Hate my hair. Hate-ow-really hate my hair. Hate my exams. Hate the fact that everyone thinks I'm an airhead it a walking pair of tits. Wish that the Nice Guy would just [REDACTED] [ANATOMICAL IMPOSSIBILITY] [IMPOLITE REFERENCE TO MALE GENITALS]. Is my roommate getting it on with someone again? Hate my hair.
So, yeah. Good thing is, we get to meet more of Ana's self-narrative later on. Brace yourself.