amarie24

An example:

Our current head instructor, Mrs. W: (2 weeks ago) Any other questions before we end this first day of class?

Classmate S, who sits beside me: Yes, ma'am. Do you record your lectures and/or allow us to record them?

Mrs. W: -long ass, wholly-disappointing explanation where she basically says she doesn't because 1.) we're nursing students & should be able to take sufficient class notes by now & 2.) just about everything she says is can be found in our textbook & online resources.

Classmate S: -nods with a tight, tight smile on her face

-The Next Day, in the classroom right before lecture starts-

Classmate S: -Is sitting down next to me & pulls out something from her pocket, still out of relative sight & under her desk; it kinda looks like an old-ass cellphone

Me: -curiously- Morning, S! Uhh...what that be?

Classmate S: Oh, hey Amarie! Yeah, it's...it's a recorder. I need all the help I can get.

Me: ...Y'need batteries?

Classmate S: -shakes head w/a big ol' smile on her face- Naw, I'm good! Thanks, tho!

Me: Alrighty, I still gotchu, tho. I ain't no snitch. Ain't no snitches in here. :P

Me: -smells something...burning...something burning with a coffee smell-

Mommy: Amarie, honey, d'you want some of this? It smells delicious!

Me: -slowly gets up from computer chair, worried for my Myrtle- What is it? What are you doing?

*Myrtle is the name of my wittle mini coffeepot that I got for Christmas 2 years ago. I named her as such because when she's working, she sounds like "mirrrtle, mirrrtle, mirrt-t-t-le" to me.

Mommy: Making coffee! It's that new strong one that I bought! Come! Have a taste!

Me: -slowly coming into the kitchen, the sheer stench assaulting my sense of smell- Mommy...?

Mommy: -beaming as she pours some of the foul stuff into a mug- Yes, sweetie?

Me: ...What have you put into Myrtle? What have you done? You're burning her-this is burnt.

Mommy: Oh, no, no! This coffee isn't burnt-it's just a really strong roast! The best kind of coffee there is! -proffers her mug to me- Want some?

Me: -retreats into my bedroom and says a prayer for Myrtle- No, thank you! Eew!!!!!

Mommy: -pouts about how her daughter doesn't like shared, burnt coffee-


...Strong roast coffee smells like burnt coffee to your Amarie, dears.

-shudders-