I Need a Superhero Hug
Thursday, December 10th, 2015 07:19 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
amarie24No, I mean I need that kind of hug where the other person is your size or bigger than you. They’re warmer and stronger too and maybe they have a long, flowy cape that they’ll wrap around you for extra warmth and security. It’s that kind of hug where they’re bigger and stronger and warmer than you and for however long you’re hugging them, your crashing and burning world disappears and it won’t come back until, well…just until. And you feel nice and warm and safe and you can sob and get snot on the superhero all you want because superhero costumes get free dry cleaning and even if they didn’t, hey, that’s not the worst things someone can get on them, amiright?
Ya’ll know about that kind of hug? Ya’ll know what I’m talking about?
That’s the kind of hug I need right now. I’ve needed that kind of hug. But there are no superheroes around in real life like that and I can’t buy one for a discounted rate off Amazon.
I’m in one of my phases where I can’t stop crying. I’m out right sobbing and it is exhausting. I can’t stop it unless I’m holding it back in front of other people, including my mother. My own arms are nothing but dry ice around me even after I put our Christmas tree up and I’m wearing mismatched footies on my feet.
I mean I need someone to tell me it’s okay not just at a futile attempt to make me feel better (because I won’t and haven’t believed it for a long time), but because no, really, it’s okay.
It’s okay.
And I don’t have to go anywhere else for it to be okay.
No, I don’t have to go anywhere else at all.
I will get a sun blooming on my horizon soon enough if I'm just patient just a little longer.
Just a little longer.
I need that so, so bad right now even though it doesn’t exist anywhere than my own head while my pillow is soaked at two o’clock and three o’clock and four o’clock in the morning.
Goddamn, I need that kind of hug.
--Amarie
Ya’ll know about that kind of hug? Ya’ll know what I’m talking about?
That’s the kind of hug I need right now. I’ve needed that kind of hug. But there are no superheroes around in real life like that and I can’t buy one for a discounted rate off Amazon.
I’m in one of my phases where I can’t stop crying. I’m out right sobbing and it is exhausting. I can’t stop it unless I’m holding it back in front of other people, including my mother. My own arms are nothing but dry ice around me even after I put our Christmas tree up and I’m wearing mismatched footies on my feet.
I mean I need someone to tell me it’s okay not just at a futile attempt to make me feel better (because I won’t and haven’t believed it for a long time), but because no, really, it’s okay.
It’s okay.
And I don’t have to go anywhere else for it to be okay.
No, I don’t have to go anywhere else at all.
I will get a sun blooming on my horizon soon enough if I'm just patient just a little longer.
Just a little longer.
I need that so, so bad right now even though it doesn’t exist anywhere than my own head while my pillow is soaked at two o’clock and three o’clock and four o’clock in the morning.
Goddamn, I need that kind of hug.
--Amarie
