I Need a Superhero Hug

[amarie24]

No, I mean I need that kind of hug where the other person is your size or bigger than you. They’re warmer and stronger too and maybe they have a long, flowy cape that they’ll wrap around you for extra warmth and security. It’s that kind of hug where they’re bigger and stronger and warmer than you and for however long you’re hugging them, your crashing and burning world disappears and it won’t come back until, well…just until. And you feel nice and warm and safe and you can sob and get snot on the superhero all you want because superhero costumes get free dry cleaning and even if they didn’t, hey, that’s not the worst things someone can get on them, amiright?

Ya’ll know about that kind of hug? Ya’ll know what I’m talking about?

That’s the kind of hug I need right now. I’ve needed that kind of hug. But there are no superheroes around in real life like that and I can’t buy one for a discounted rate off Amazon.

I’m in one of my phases where I can’t stop crying. I’m out right sobbing and it is exhausting. I can’t stop it unless I’m holding it back in front of other people, including my mother. My own arms are nothing but dry ice around me even after I put our Christmas tree up and I’m wearing mismatched footies on my feet.

I mean I need someone to tell me it’s okay not just at a futile attempt to make me feel better (because I won’t and haven’t believed it for a long time), but because no, really, it’s okay.

It’s okay.

And I don’t have to go anywhere else for it to be okay.

No, I don’t have to go anywhere else at all.

I will get a sun blooming on my horizon soon enough if I'm just patient just a little longer.

Just a little longer.

I need that so, so bad right now even though it doesn’t exist anywhere than my own head while my pillow is soaked at two o’clock and three o’clock and four o’clock in the morning.

Goddamn, I need that kind of hug.


--Amarie

Comments

[silveradept]

Superhero hugs are the greatest, when you can get them, of course. Until then, though, have maybe some regular hugs in bulk?

[amarie24]

Yeah...I'll see about regular hugs in bulk from my mom and wittle Dante. That's a good idea.

[redsixwing]

*squishy internet virtual hugs*

Hang in there, friend.

[amarie24]

Thankies, Red. Thankies much.

[indigodragon]

*LOADS YOU UP with so many virtual hugs* I know they're not physical but at least knowing someone out there cares can help a bit? :( *HUGGLES STILL*

You are an amazing, beautiful, wonderful, sassy, intelligent, brilliant, funny, personable, and creatively awesome woman and I feel so blessed to know you hun! <3 It's okay to feel this way, even if you don't know why. It's okay to want and need hugs, and soak in the ones you get in your life from the ones you love. <3 It's okay to cry and cry, and wonder when it'll stop. It's okay to feel melancholy, depressed, sad, and lonely, and to wonder when it'll end. It always ends. That's the great (and sometimes not so great) thing about emotions. They ALWAYS end. You just gotta hang tight until they do. Maybe sleep can help too? :) <3 I love you so much hun! <3 You can do it! I know you can! You're doing amazing so far! It's okay to feel knocked down by life sometimes, to want to curl up and cry and do nothing. Let yourself do so. :) You need a break, a period to rejuvenate away from the mess of the outside world. <3 And that's your body's way of telling you! So it's TOTALLY okay to feel this way, and it's actually one of the most human things to feel! <3 I hope reading this can help you at least a little bit? I know its something that I tend to respond well to, when I feel things similar to you, but do let me know if it doesn't work for you? Everybody's different and I want to help you the best I can, in the way that YOU need help hun! <3 *HUGGLING STILL* You have all the hugs in the world from me! <3

[amarie24]

-huggles back tightly- Thank you, friend. Thank you so, so, so much for this. Thank you.

[indigodragon]

You are so welcome! <3 *HUGGLES* Here's all the hugs I can possibly give to you! <3 It was just the truth as how I see it. :3

[amarie24]

Awww, thank you again. I thank you more than I can possibly say, friend. :)

[indigodragon]

You are so very welcome my friend! <3 *ALL THE HUGS*

[pebblerocker]

*massive hugs*

I want someone to fly down and fix everything for you.

[amarie24]

*hugs back tightly* Thank you, Pebble. Thank you oh-so much. :(

[trascendenza]

You absolutely deserve that kind of hug.

In lieu of being able to provide it for you, I'm sending you the best wishes and sincere reassurance that it is truly okay. I'm guessing everything inside of you doesn't feel that way, and when I'm in that place it seems so impossible to believe, but it is nonetheless true, and you will be able to feel it again at some point.

In the meantime, we're believing it for you until you can again. <3 <3 <3

[amarie24]

Thank you, thank you, and thank you, friend.

It..it really is okay. I'm trying to see that. I'm trying my hardest to see that every day. Yes.